Transcript: Thanks, Allan. Here’s part two of our amazing interview with David Gilks.
Well, and when you’re exploring the difficult pieces of your life, that helps you help others explore the difficult pieces in their life. Right?
David Gilks: Absolutely. For me, I believe it has to … any ability to teach on any topic comes from a place of knowing.
David Brower: You bet.
David Gilks: Right? I trained as a professional bodybuilder, a natural bodybuilder, so I went through that process, understand all the groundwork. So when people come to me for advice, it has all the failures attached to it, all the new awareness and understanding, all the dead ends. That’s invaluable experience. I think that’s the part where … I don’t know if you know of an author Caroline Myss.
David Brower: I don’t.
David Gilks: She’s a spiritual author. She’s kind of the grandmother you’re afraid of, because she’s going to punch you right in the throat with the Holy Bible. But I love her because she’s a no B.S. kind of human being. But she said something really beautiful, she said that, in one of her books Sacred Contracts said that, before you were born you were talking to your creator and act as innocent.
So when I’m on this planet here’s what I want, here’s what I’m looking for, I want to be courageous. I want to be resilient. I think that’s important. I want to be empathetic as well, like I just still want to be able to have a heart. I want to be long suffering and you actually have all these attributes. Well, how do you how do you gain strength? By being challenged? How do you gain empathy? You gain empathy by walking in somebody else’s shoes. You know what the experience is like, you know what the challenge is like.
And so it’s kind of like a Mother Teresa thing, right? It’s just you, you go through all these challenges, and then you realize that these challenges are actually become trial by fire, if you wish to kind of reframe it that way. And now you have a huge following that experiences speak from, that’s authentic. And as long as you actually made your way successfully to the other side, you actually pave a path that so many other will people follow.
David Brower: Love that. Because you have to embrace the challenges, you can’t run from them because that’s how you learn, that’s how you grow, that’s how you develop 2020 hindsight, so you can look back and go, “Oh man, I’m glad I went through that crap.” Right?
David Gilks: Absolutely. Probably the best book I’ve ever read … I think if I only have one book Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl. And he was a Jewish psychologists living in … he went through the German death camps for three years, he survived. And as a psychologist, he might have been a psychologist living in the Nazis death camps, like this sort of amazing mind happens to witness, you couldn’t even imagine. But he said something really interesting, in the back of his book he said it, the challenge that we have, I remember he had written in 1950.
The challenges that North Americans have specifically is that, they don’t see any honor in their suffering, right? They can’t even see the suffering as an honorable thing, which Europeans actually talked a lot about the suffering, right? Their music is about it, their art, a lot is very melancholy. But he says, the most important thing is that not only are we ashamed, not only do we not gain an ability in our suffering, but we’re ashamed of our own habits.
David Brower: Wow. My gosh.
David Gilks: Now if he saw that 1950, how much more prevalent is that in our social media world where people are advocating on the prettiest faces as possible, the best life. And yes, there is a lot of great things out there, but there’s a lot of really loud [inaudible 00:03:52] as well. You don’t have to go to the broadcast, and be a real downer all the time, but don’t be ashamed of it. That’s the whole learning experience that you said before, that’s where experience comes from.
David Brower: Well, and the other piece of that and you were there since in spades and that is being authentic to who you are, because people get that, whether they relate to it or not knowingly they do, they can tell, okay, this guy has integrity. This guy’s authentic. I’m going to pay attention.
David Gilks: And I think more and more that is becoming a conversation, and we see especially again in the social media world where, the world is sampling it out. The authenticity is a big conversation about, do you focus on that branding a business or you focus on telling the truth? And people are really looking for that. People are looking for something, looking for the authenticity and a conversation that doesn’t make them feel bad about who they are, right?
David Brower: Right. Could not agree more. Yes.
David Gilks: Yes, your life is perfect, and so I’m a schwartz, right? And I can live up to it. But I think we give people possibility, because people are … we are more authentic about our struggles and again we’re not beating the drum of it. But we’re just, we’re nothing, but a struggle, we’re are saying, but here’s here’s the solution. Here’s how I got past it, and it helps a lot to give people opportunities to fall somewhere in between those places, but we really do a lot market for so many people in such … and especially now not to confused world.
David Brower: Yes, absolutely. So do you travel around a lot and help train, and help educate people, and all those kinds of things? Do you put on seminars out? How do people get what you have?
David Gilks: Well, it’s interesting over the last 10 years, it’s been a long developmental process, mainly because of fear, little concern, but pretty good. No one wants to be judged, right? I’m six foot bodybuilder and joining brains in that brawn, kind of symbiotic. So right now I’m actually in the process, we’re shooting the last the videos for online programs, for theiamproject.com which will have, what will be the push up to our online course and then coming up in April and October of next year. We actually, we have two retreat happening in Mexico.
So we’re going to have two while we go on retreat. At the El dorado, L’Oreal, Mexico so we’re lining that up. But as of June 15, the program will be online and but we’re also working on, we started work with traditions Rafi teachings, counselors, social workers, showing them, how to use The I am project. The I am project technology. Because it’s a whole part system that we’ve created. June 15 it’s coming out there live. So I’m really excited to finally get this thing out. Out of my head.
David Brower: Absolutely. Absolutely. Its been in your head for a while hasn’t it?
David Gilks: Yes, it’s sounds like, it’s just that a lot of, just a lot of concerns, right? It’s just you stick your neck out with an opinion, right? You’re going to get clobbered because that’s just the way it is nowadays, especially in the safety of the social media environment, right? Just to take shots from cover.
David Brower: Well yes, deserved or undeserved, they’re coming at you left and right and so that’s where the that’s where the honesty, the integrity, the authenticity, and the consistency all play a great role. So that all that negative stuff could just roll off your shoulders and you can stay the course, because you know you’re on the right path.
David Gilks: Well, and I think part of it is that once you realize, it’s just a … I look at the opportunities I’ve had in life, they allowed me to get here and my path was very, unique. A lot of people may not have that opportunity to actually disengage from life for three and a half years to go study. It’s like going to a monastery, because that’s not available to the average person, I’m more afraid of not getting it out there, the more because of the impact that it makes within the business take to the program. Some more afraid of not making impact than I am up getting the occasional heckling from the social media audience.
David Brower: Good for you. So you’re, I mean, you’ve obviously touched a lot of lives over the last 25 years and in with using video, the internet, you’re I am project, I mean, you’re just kind of scratching the surface on really where you see this thing going. Aren’t you?
David Gilks: Yes. The fact that I have traditions attending my courses, wanting to be partner, wanting to partner up with me in this process, they see something extraordinary in it. And again this is not just in my creation entirely, with the old expression I stand on the shoulders of giants.
David Brower: Well, yeah. You’ve got, I mean, you got the ultimate sponge going on so that makes perfect sense.
David Gilks: There’s some probably pretty aspects of the program is that, one of my tagline is that, if you never actually had to use the words would you always tell the truth? So what’s it like to go to talk to a counselor, and I know, I’ve spent the money, for $200 an hour, to walk out of there knowing that you only told them one hundredth of what you really wanted to say.
You just couldn’t articulate the words, especially for males or teenagers. So this is a completely non-verbal tool that people use to actually explore the absolute truth of how they believe the world is set up, and how to stabilize it. So either you will be talking to me or be talking to one of our counselors who use the program, you’re not actually telling them what happened. You’re not trying to, because as soon as you start trying to talk about it you filter, you the filter out the reality of what it really looks like or feels like for you and you’re using the filtered version because sometimes if you actually told the truth, you might lose your mind. It so over whelming.
So one of the things we’re looking at in the beginning, is going into the prison systems and working with people that are on their last year of their incarceration. And helping them remap, remap the world, remap their lifestyle, so that when they come out they can grow it and their bid on task in building a new life.
David Brower: Wow. That’s going to be a life changer because, I mean, I got goose bumps on that one. Good for you. Good for you. And that’s part of your core essentials really mental coaching and working with these people on neurofeedback and changing their pathways, right?
David Gilks: Yes. Well, we have to assume that, that there’s a presupposition that people aren’t broken. They just lack of resources. So if we can actually get people basically, you know, name the game comes through an acronym that I created called Sam. We’re going to stabilize you, before we do anything, either mentally or physically we’re going to give you a stable point to come from, but we must have what that looks like first before we make any decision.
Secondly, we’re going to activate or start focusing on your targets, but all your goals physical or mental or financial are going to come from a stable position. And then the last thing we’re going to do is, actually start moving towards those goals. But every time you make a decision, we go back to the same point in place inside of our mind, or inside of our body, where it’s going to be stable first. So no matter where you go, I’ll know who you are. You’ll be predictable even to yourself.
David Brower: Wow. Imagine that being predictable to yourself, instead of just going 117 things a minute. I can’t that, that’s going to change some lives there, brother.
David Gilks: It really is, it’s a fascinating thing and for instance if you travel on some, of the other countries, you’ll get a sense of peace that you just don’t get your North America. It’s just so volatile here. And so, the energy to me it feels very symptomatic while I’m in the Mediterranean or I’m in Central America. I just feel a sense of calm, because it’s congruency because no matter where you go, like these little countries, you are no Catholic, you’re no Catholic Nicaraguan, you are not an old Catholic Nicaragua who has traditions and dies, I go back hundreds, and hundreds, and hundreds of years.
And it creates a bit of a foundational premise, so I make my decision as they all capitals Nicaragua Spanish speaking person who has like this. What I’m also an accountant. So, you know what I mean?
David Brower: Yes.
David Gilks: So being American … what does it mean to be an American or Canadian, is the geographical difference. So if you’re an American Texan, American Californian, you’re not even seeing me a bit from a different velocity by geographically, right, you have a kinship that’s it. And the same in my country, we live in British Columbia, or you live in the East Coast Canada. You’re Canadian but that’s it, just that’s a geographic thing, that’s not a philosophical thing. But you live in old countries or Catholic or whatever the case may be, it’s a deep energy, old energy that so comforting that we just don’t have here.
David Brower: And I think one of the … if you have the opportunity, you’re going to speak to this better than I. But if anybody has the opportunity to feel that kind of calm just once, it’s gonna just blow their mind and they’ll want to know how do I get back to that. I just I missed that, even if it was for a day I missed that, you know.
David Gilks: Well, a lot of people where you live, in the mountainous areas. What does it feel like look away from the city, and some buildings, and just this look into a mountain. I’m actually putting on my screen top here, I’ve got a picture the Rocky Mountains. And there is connection, right, ah. You feel that place.
David Brower: We live 30 minutes from Rocky Mountain National Park. And so my wife’s therapy is to go to Rocky Mountain National Park and just hike, you know, hike for hours. And she’ll come down and her cheeks will be red, or oxygen will be great, her shoulders will be dropped, focus will be strong, and her smile will be wide, and it’s just fascinating. I get the same feeling when I ride my Harley Davidson, to be honest with you. She gets that, she understands that puts me in that same place. So, to be able to find something that gives you that calm and energizes your soul is just, oh, my gosh life changing.
David Gilks: Well, and I think it’s just recognizing what that is. And not compromising it, ready for anything. I don’t think it’s necessary. I don’t think it’s necessary to sacrifice, part of your life for attainment of anything, even for your children. I don’t think we should have to suffer, because that’s the conversation going out there, you want to make a million dollars you got to suffer. You want to have that … want to have a certain type of lifestyle your kids, you got to suffer.
And there are some challenges, but it’s just, but again, I think it goes to The I am piece. There’s, anytime we ask something of life which basically we’re asking, we are asking the conversation side of our head. Though the fact that we don’t know who are asking, we don’t know if you pose a question side your mind, does anyone any number of experiences, and ideas, the philosophies, that you’ve developed over the entire course of your history, is there waned answer? And we have no idea who’s stepping up to answer the question, you just posed in your mind. And that the most frightening thing of all. Slight errors in the formation of the question results in massive errors on the answers.
David Brower: Well, and fear is traumatizing, I mean, if you can’t figure out a way to eliminate or at least reduce the fear, so that you can get to a point of hearing part of the answer. I mean, it’s just fight or flight and you’re just gone, you know.
David Gilks: Probably the easiest tool it … ever given people have said, if you look at your emotional state and you give a try, try being on your heart, well being on your heart, makes you present. If you’re not present, well, you’re going to have an issue with you and, you and the highway going to need each other in a very bad that way.
So your present to the environment, since your wife wants to go hiking, when your present it is the only time we actually feel good, which is like philosophers been telling us for, decades, be present. My feelings tell me where I’m living, and if I’m depressed, and I’m kind of sadly nostalgic, I’m actually re-experiencing my history that distorted my mind. If I’m fearful, and I’m anxiety, I’m fantasizing of something that hasn’t even happened yet. So only time I actually feel good is when I’m present, right? Which is all you got.
So the trick is, is to be present, to be centered, right, which is the whole I am piece, to be centered before you start making a decision. So if you take any great experience in your life, lets you take the top three great experiences and you think about what it was, how it felt, what it felt in your body, and maybe is about you being an incredible a lot, incredible friend, incredible spouse, may be active contribution that were really profound and not only with a very … with greatly opportunity, but they also touched you in a very unique way.
So they have these experiences, but if you actually sat in those experiences first and then you made your big decisions, and you said in the knowledge of I’m that person, I would not … that if I asked my mind, my mind is going to say, “Hey Dave remember like, you went bankrupt and 87 and that was freaking,” and be just a failure a man, and you screwed up, and you put everybody on the hook, because you’re bad, you be like your brain to spit all this stuff out and then it’s going to ask you, do you really want to do that?
And so, I find the making process really comes down to deciding who I am, and I pick it. So you talk to your memory so listen, I know that there’s evidence of meeting really straight up human being and here’s the proof. Here’s three examples of proof. I’m going to anchor that into my conscious. I want to remember that every freaking morning when I wake up, when I need to make a decision, when I’m feeling freaked out. I won’t actually ask the fear. Fear is just a … fear is not the truth. It’s just say, “Hey, what do you think? Hey, what do you think,” it’s asking your opinion, it’s not saying this is the truth. So if I can say to myself and then I said to myself, and then I look to the fear and say, “Yes, this is true. No, it’s not true.” But I do on the center position, and it makes all difference in the world.
David Brower: All the difference in the world. Wow. This has been so fascinating and we’re almost, we’re going to make this into a two part because we’re almost at 40 minutes already.
David Gilks: Oh, wow.
David Brower: Which is fascinating to me. So, it speaks volumes about what you bring to the table and how you can touch people’s lives. And speaking of that, so people want to get in touch with you learn more about who you are, what you bring to the table, how they can improve their lives, they can do the SEM, they can do all these things. What’s, what’s the best way for them to approach you and look at The I am project, and the fitness three project and all the different things you do?
David Gilks: Yes, probably, I mean, Facebook of course is a great media and it’s very easy access medium. So David Gilks, so g i l k s so you can find me on Facebook there. And then, of course, to The I am project very soon we’ll be migrating it over from the temporary site that we have now, but there is contact page on there, which is of course theiamproject.com and then there are I am articles are on Instagram as well, as David Gilks as well.
David Brower: Social media galore, easy to reach out to, easy to contact, and lots of information on that social media on your websites, in on your Facebook page and those kinds of things. So folks, I encourage you, check out David Gilks because he’s lived the hardest stuff and now is living the dream, and you can obviously help people get there as well, so that’s good living man.
David Gilks: I appreciate it, life is extraordinary but its a lot more fun when you get to share it.
David Brower: True story. Absolutely right. David Gilks so check him out to theiamproject.com and thanks so much for being with us today. It’s been a real treat.
David Gilks: I really appreciate it. And I hope to get a chance to get out there and see different parts of the world.
David Brower: Please do, I’ll give you a ride on my Harley.
David Gilks: Alright [inaudible 00:19:30]
Allan Blackwell: Your 20 minute podcast with David Brower, has been brought to you by audible. You can listen to any of David’s podcasts anywhere podcast can be found, including I Heart Radio, The Spotify mobile app and the davidrowervo.com/your20minutepodcast. Until next time, thanks for listening.
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